hey.

I cannot even begin to digest the fact that school is restarting tomorrow. the very thought of being compelled to put a halt to all the plans&routines is fucking depressing. I may adore school but, mm. anyway, updatesss(;
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9/6/2009
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wokeup early(fucking earliest Ive wokenup these hols, was pretty proud of myself;P) around noon, and met cally darling in Bangsar. caughtup over lunch at Marmalade,

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had icecream at baskinrobbins after getting our eyebrows done,

chocolatechipcookiedough

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.. &decided to get pedicures at my fav manipadi shop, Kukubar.


french pediiii's. mine's on the right.
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yknow, me and an old BFF of mine used to get mani/pedis on a such a frequent basis lastyear. alot may have changed since then, but its tres dissapointing how I hardly make time to pamper myself nowadays:/ bought slices of cake from Delicious for mom, and was home by 6pm. was supposed to go out again with cally at 10pm but was exhausted. talked to clarence and vegitated infrontve the telly, buried under bags of keropok till konging at 5am. of jampi-casting rabbits, wrongly lit cigs, faux rempits &psycho cabbies♥
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10/6/2009
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chaotically emotional day. blame it on the hormones or the numerous issues I found myself suddenly aware of and entangled in, but I was sobbing like a baby for hours on end. Ive gone through SO much over the years, the wreck of a state I was in surprised even me. as per usual Im not going into details on things as personal as this, but all Im going to say is; I wish I didnt seethrough the fake facades & acidlies the people I used to trust the most in my life was throwing my way so easily. it has always taken alot before I let someone in so to have discovered what I discovered, fucking shattered my heart.
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11/6/2009
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happy 19th, darren lok(: its funny how after all weve been through I dont have a picture of us.
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bummed the day away before sueanne amoigeram(who was previously away for pangkor with her fam for abit) picks me up around 8pm. we restock on cigs, and I lug my bigass pink velvet bag filled to the brim with stuff to her place. we take showers blabla, and headout to Yumcha with adenaur and markian at Kopitiam later at night. we were chitchatting for so long we ended up being the last ones there, with the bhangra workers waiting impatiently to closeshop till 1.30am haha.
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promptly after reaching home, we headover to tekkin nikkid's.



bryan chan.

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didnt sleep for a second allnight long. a certain something happened at 4am, but never will the secret escape our lips(; of powerful pinky promises, awkard+ hilariously moving monstrosities, first ketuls &language barriers♥ sueanne, bryran, gray and I left tekkin's around 8am.
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12/6/2009
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the four of us had brekkie at McD's where we were faced with a fucking racist cashier(who's ass got bitten by karma when she gave us extra RM20 change HAHA) and was back at sueanne's by 11.30am. I showered, and rushed like crazy to meet calista(who was fresh back from Indon) at AC as promised while sueanne stayed home.


bumped into keith, vincent etc before going to calista's for lunch.


calista love
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went back to sueanne's around 5pm. changed, and napped for a petty 2hours only to wakeup wishing we hadnt napped as we felt worse than ever as soon as our eyes reopened. was supposed to yumcha but neither of us posessed the mood or appetite to, so decided against it in the end, resting in our pyjammies instead.


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we shower, and headout to tekkin nikkid's onceagain at 1-ish am. the night goesby on a repetitive but happier note, and we're up all night again. of manis-as-fuck tictacs, heartbreaking stories, redwine &uncalled for dramatic pauses♥ left around noon.




gray.


nikkid
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13/6/2009
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we hastily shower upon reaching sueanne's as we only had 10mins to get dressed. sueanne's dad takes us out for brekkie nearby and sueanne and I go over to my place after. was DAMN FUCK STRUNGOUT but couldnt sleep or reveal how our bodies were dying, as my fam+sueanne leave for Pavillion to shop for my Bday gift minutes after reaching home. daddy and the boys leave earlier, so had plenty of time for mom, sueanne and I to bond(:
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ended up choosing to wait*insidething. as heartwrenching as it was Id rather wait than to settle for something I didnt really want, sigh! :/ mom and I shared cigs and a frap at CoffeeBean before heading home at 5pm. of newfound love+respect for mom, impossible signboards, 3kg losses, faux techno tunes &red cheeks♥ took longggg showers and mygawd, by night sueanne and I were walking carcrashes o.o chose our health over everything by declining offers to club/drink, and slept at 11pm. by that point, I was running on absolutely NO SLEEP FOR FORTYTHREE HOURS &NO FOOD FOR 2DAYS.
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14/6/2009(today)
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fighting to sleep the nightbefore was a sheer battle. wokeup at 8am, and attended Sundayschool in jeans, vans, and with no makeup on. the fam went for the usual Sundaylunch while I joined a snoring sueanne in the guestroom till 3pm. sueanne left in the evening, and auntyivy+ fam came over soon after. spent the day aiding my hoarse throat and babysitting babytania. I seriously wonder how Im going to manage properly answering the typical " How'd your hols go? " question tomorrow o.o imagine trying to explain the last 2weeks if you were me? haha. but fuckkit. its going to be difficult as usual, getting back into routine but I always manage(: MY 17TH BIRTHDAY IS IN 3DAYS! ;D hee. goodniiiight people.
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no matter what gets in my way;
as long as theres still life in me
no matter what remember;
you know I'll always come for you♥

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p/s: I regret not picking you over him all those months ago.
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xxx